THE MOST IMPORTANT POLTICAL FILM EVER MADE!
There’s been a lot of politics in the news lately, what with all the politics that’s been going on. You may not know this, but I am quite the political prognosticator. I predicted that John Kerry would win in ’04, and that Dukakis would triumph in ’88, and that Shirley Chisholm would be swept into the White House in 1972. I realize that none of these predictions came true, but I’m hoping that if I’m wrong enough times, I’ll get hired as a cable TV news pundit.
But until then, I thought I’d reveal what I think is the most important political film ever made, but in the spirit of our democratic process, I first will list an entire field of contenders before I cast my vote.
The candidates are…
THE CANDIDATE
This is the one where Robert Redford, after being unexpectedly elected, says, “What do we do now?” The answer to that is simple: Start running for reelection, silly!
ALL THE PRESIDENTS MEN
They say this is a true story about the two journalists who took down the Nixon administration, but I find the idea that members of the mainstream media would go after a powerful politician very implausible. I think if they made this movie today it would be about Woodward and Bernstein going to the White House Correspondents dinner and laughing at All The President’s Jokes and then having brandy and cigars afterwards and talking about what a swell guy the President is.
BEING THERE
Don’t you think that the Chance Gardiner character, played by Peter Sellers, would quickly get over his whole “I like to watch” kick if he ever watched “The O’Reilly Factor?”
ADVICE AND CONSENT
This sober-minded, even-handed, and meticulously researched look into the inner workings of our government will blow your freakin’ mind, man! It was very trendy back in the sixties to take acid and then totally trip out at a midnight screening of “Advise and Consent.” (Oh, wait, I think I’m getting it mixed up with “2001: A Space Odyssey.” Still, “Advise and Consent” is a pretty good movie.)
MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON
Jimmy Stewart plays Jefferson Smith, an idealist from the heartland who comes to Washington with dreams of nobly serving the country he loves and then is nearly crushed and destroyed by the corrupt system. This movie was made in 1939, so of course its portrayal of a crooked government and a complacent and easily manipulated media is really dated by now…right? …Right? …Eh, heh, (clearing throat and moving on).
THE GREAT MCGINTY
The first film written and directed by Preston Sturges. It is the story of McGinty, played by Brian Donlevy, who after impressing a political boss by voting for a candidate dozens of times in one election, rises though the ranks of the political machine and is eventually “elected” Governor. Once McGinty is Governor, he doesn’t become involved in prostitution scandal, so this movie might not seem realistic to modern audiences, but believe me, this great comedy is Preston Sturges at his best. “The Miracle Of Morgan’s Creek,” “The Lady Eve,” “Sullivan’s Travels,” “The Palm Beach Story,” and “Hail The Conquering Hero” are also great Preston Sturges movies and all have their partisans.
THE MAN WHO SHOT LIBERTY VALANCE
This is a western but it also provides a kind of civics lesson about the American political process when the western territories were struggling to become a part of these United States. But what better way to sit through a civics lesson than watching John Wayne, Jimmy Stewart, and Lee Marvin ‘a shootin’ and ‘a fightin’ and ‘a livin’ out the maxim that the Washington Press Corps continues to live by to this day: “when the legend becomes fact, print the legend.”
THE BEST MAN
Gore Vidal’s witty, fast-paced screenplay takes place at a brokered Presidential Convention with Henry Fonda as the thoughtful, intellectual Adlai Stevenson-esque candidate, Cliff Robertson as the brutal, devious Richard Nixon-esque candidate, and Lee Tracy as the homespun, hard-bitten Harry Truman-esque former President, whose endorsement could tip the outcome either way. If politics was as entertaining in real life as it is in this movie, “Washington Week In Review” might get a higher rating than “A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila.”
Okay, those are the also-ran candidates for “Most Important Political Film Ever Made.” They all have ample reasons to win my vote, but ultimately, the political film that won over the Super Delegates in my heart was…
THE “VOTE FOR ME” EPISODE OF THE PATTY DUKE SHOW
First of all, I realize that this isn’t even a movie, but an episode of a TV show. However, it is on film, so the rules committee will allow it, as long as it is not shown in Florida or Michigan. Secondly, I have to admit right up front that I haven’t seen this episode since it first aired well over forty years ago. And I must add that while I never had anything against “The Patty Duke Show,” I was never particularly passionate about it either. I doubt if it would even make my personal all time Top 100 TV shows list. And I only have a vague, hazy memory of the episode in question.
But I do recall one element of the story that I thought was hilarious at the time and that I have always remembered and cherished to this day. The main storyline had to do with Patty (played by Patty Duke) and her foreign exchange student cousin Cathy (also played by Patty Duke, thus the gimmick and premise of the series) both running for Student Council President at their school. During a debate scene, Patty got up and made a speech, then Cathy made a speech, and then a third candidate, a shy and mousey girl, went up the podium and said in a nondescript Brooklyn-accented voice, “Vote for me,” and then sat back down. That was her entire speech: “Vote for me.” It made me laugh when I was ten-years old and it still makes me laugh every time I think of it. It is a tribute to our democracy that even an average, run of the mill television program like “The Patty Duke Show,” can still come up with a single joke that is capable of giving me pleasure all these years later.
Now, for my closing statement:
Did you know that John Spenser, who played the White House Chief Of Staff on “The West Wing,” was also a regular on “The Patty Duke Show?”
Okay, as informative as that was, it wasn’t much of a closing statement. So, now, here is my actual closing statement:
“The Patty Duke Show” prominently featured William Schallert, a terrific character actor who was in a million movies and TV shows. Yet whenever anyone of my generation sees him in anything, we always immediately think, “Oh, Patty Duke’s father.”
Okay, that was also an informative yet inadequate way to conclude this post, so here is my absolute final closing statement:
It is important to participate in our American electoral process, as flawed as it is. So please, I beseech you, this November, whichever candidate wins you over with their argument to “Vote For Me,” please get out to your local polling place and Vote For Him or Vote For Her, but by all means, VOTE!
Don’t Let Me Influence You
Well, another TIME “100 Most Influential People” issue has come and gone and to the credit of their journalistic integrity, I’ve been omitted from the list. I’m OK with that. I’m not sure what I would do with all that influence if I were to wield it anyway. I only hope to avoid becoming one of the least influential people – where waiters laugh at you when you give your order and you pay sticker price for cars because you couldn’t get the guy to go any lower. Sadly the inclusion on the list of Brazilian evangelical soccer player, Kaka, confirms what I already suspected – I am already less influential than Kaka.
I’m looking forward to making more CT’s next week. We’ve been calling it a series for a while but for it to actually become one is exciting. No longer will we have to answer questions like “What the hell is your problem?” and “What, was this some weird practical joke?” or the ever popular “Which episode of CT is your favorite…oh wait, there’s only ONE, ass!” I’m sure next weeks blogs will give you a window into the experience, - not a clean window, but if you rub some of dirt away with your sleeve, you’ll be able to get at least a sordid glimpse.
Thanks to everyone who watched and commented on my short film, “The Mediocre Samaritan” I’ll leave it posted if you haven’t had the chance.
